Recently I was inspired by attending a live showing of my favorite Public Radio show (yes, I'm aware I just outed my geek self, and I'm proud o it!), This American Life, and as such, am doing a series of interviews with folks regarding "Things I Thought Were True When You Were Little".
I'll give you some quick examples.
#1- As a small child, I thought we had no bones. You know those diagrams of people facing the side, arms out, mouth open? They usually had a tube where the throat was, and perhaps a stomach or other single organ, and the rest was colored in red. I logically assumed that yes, we had a throat, and perhaps a stomach or otehr single organ, and the rest of the body was just meat. No bones, none of that, just solid meat. I dont remember when I found out about the skeleton and the circulatory system and the organs and all that, but I was surprised.
#2- My brother, as a very small child (five, MAYBE) would tell stories that began with "When I was little, when I used to be a girl...." Not only was a five year old telling stories about the good old days when he was little, but he (erroneously, by the way) thought he used to be a girl.
#3- Many children believe "Mom" and "Dad" are their mom and dad's real names. I've seen a child in the moment when they realized, quite against their will, that their Grandma's name was not, in fact, Grandma, but something else, like Elaine. It blows their mind. They are intolerant of the idea that Grandma is not Grandma's name.
#4- I remember the moment I realized that the music I was hearing on the radio was not in fact performed live in studio each and every time I heard it, which relieved the anxiety in my tiny mind about how on earth those musicians managed to keep up the stamina and schedule neccessary to make it to the radio studio at any given moment, one the whim of the Dj or possibly a caller making a request. I pictured them rushing from station to station, performing their hit, and running off again to another station to do the same.
#5-Lastly, (and this contradicts my parameters a bit, below, but I love it nonetheless) at around ten or eleven, my brother Gabe had me convinced that "Son of a Maraca" was a swear word. I was duped. Hey, it SOUNDS dirty.
Now, after chatting to a few people about their own stories, I have seen that I need to clarify a few parameters: I am searching for the kinds of stories that didn't come from a parent or gaurdian telling you some farcical cautionary tale about otherwise innocent activity. Example: Grandma tells you your face will stay like that if you keep it up. Mom warns you a watermelon will grow in your stomach if you swallow the seeds. Uncle Rico tells you Cheerios are doughnut seeds. Step Dad tells you the medical staples in his forehead from a recent accident are really holding his head onto his body (is anyone else noticing a pattern of blatent exploitation of childlike trust and moldable minds, here?)
What I am fascinated by is the Occam's Razor effect that children's minds invariably access by default in complex situations where a rational answer is needed, but none is offered--the very essence of Occam's Law of Succinctness: "All other things being equal, the simplest solution is the best." In other words, when multiple competing theories are equal in other respects, the principle recommends selecting the theory that introduces the fewest assumptions and postulates the fewest entities--so, knowing the basics of radio, instead of my six year old mind assuming that the music I'm hearing is made up of non-material sound waves travelling through time and space from a satellite in space to the complex electronic components in my radio from a recording made through the elaborate technological feat that is modern recording, I unconsciously instituted Occam's Razor and came up with the simplest solution: the people are in the studio playing live. Same goes for all those poor children who assumed (rightly so, given the information available) that the television set was full of tiny people. As adults we find it absurd, asking questions like, "Ok, then, how do you think they got IN there?", but really we should be applauding their rationality in the face of what is otherwise a complete mystery to them.
So it's not "I thought the Easter Bunny/Santa/Tooth Fairy was real" sort of thing--You believed that because someone told you to believe it. I want to know what you rationalized to explain the world around you. Frequently these kinds of stories begin with "I remember the day I found out/realized/was told ______" and is accompanied by abiding shock and a similar self- or other imposed questioning of WHY we had never questioned that belief in the first place.
Why didn't we assume Mom had a real name? Well the better question is why should we? It's what you've been calling her all your life, correct? It's not like Dad sat you down at five months and said, "Now, look, I just want you to know your mom's name is Karen. We'll all be referring to her as "Mom" for the next 75 years, but her name is Karen. K?" If that were the case, then yes, duh.
These aren't the kinds of stories most people can pull up right away (unless the revelation of the truth in that individual situation was particularly scarring), so don't answer right away--give it a week, think on it, and get back to me. Dig deep into that childhood of yours. I'll be compiling the stories and creating images for each one. It's an experiment/exercise/documentary project. Thank you in advance for participating! I can't wait to see/hear what creative, entertaining, brilliantly childlike stories you dig up.
Sincerely, Anna
p.s. Please pass this along to anyone you can think of...the more stories the better! Perfect strangers, prison pen-pals, the dentist. Whoever. Cheers!
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